Sexual Bus Driving Story From Hell

I find a sex book on my bus

The above photo is one of my favorite bus pictures. I was driving the 554 loser cruiser route from Issaquah to downtown Seattle. It’s called the loser cruiser because the homeless board it and come to Issaquah and steal from department stores while the police watch. They then board the 554 with clothes still on hangers with price tags dangling and go back to Seattle and sell it. Then repeat. I went to the bathroom and there was a man waiting at the zone but when I came out, he was gone but his boots were there.

I’ve got a few sexual bus driving stories. Sex sells right? I learned that in my brief college adventure. It was in a marketing class. Write the word sex in super small font on the front cover of a book and your sub-conscious sees it, records it and transfers the message over to your conscious mind—BUY THAT FUCKING BOOK. It predominately works on males ages 13-29 so we were taught. Teacher was a female.

 I found a book on my bus, and it had the word sex on the front cover.

How could a book about sex written by a comedian be a New York Times bestseller? They don’t know anything about sex. Is it a sex joke book? I was intrigued. I started reading the book and I fucking hated it. Bloody awful. The 25-year-old author claimed he was a sex addict. His mom must be proud…..he confessed. I laughed. Bloody hell. Every 25-year-old bloke is a sex addict and then it starts tapering off at 30, and by the time you’re 40 your 69 Camaro is your dominant thought. Fifty comes along and you discover you like to read old western books. When I turned 60, I had a discussion with another friend about sex, he was older by two years, and here’s his exact words, “It’s too messy.” My reply, “Did you just now discover that?” It really starts fading off to memory land in your 60’s unless you’re Robert Kennedy Jr. Although even he has said he’s slowing down.

I’ve read a lot of books in my 62 years, but I truly thought this was the worst book I had ever read. In fact, I didn’t make it to the end. Torturous reading. I kept reading expecting it to change somewhere into the New York Times bestseller. I thought about giving it to someone else and let them read it, see if they agree with me. Terrible idea. What kind of friend would do that? I then decided to throw the book in the trash. Then I thought what if it somehow falls off the garbage truck and someone finds it. They see the word sex on the front cover and take it home to read like I did. They too determine it is bloody awful and I’m responsible for their torture.  

I settled on burning it. But that idea got interrupted from Universe. It was crystal clear—DON’T BURN IT. When Universe comes in that strong, I listen. TEAR IT UP. FEED IT TO YOUR WORMS. USE THE WORM SHIT IN YOUR GARDEN. GET SOMETHING OUT OF IT. Who could argue with that? I ripped the book to shreds, soaked it in water and covered my worm boxes with the book and they ate every word and shit it out. Black Gold for my garden.

Russel is currently trending in the news.

 Forty-seven minutes ago NY Post headline: Russell Brand sexual assault allegations live updates.

AP News one day ago: Russel Brand: UK police urged to investigate sex assault allegations against comedian. Why would they have to be urged?

People one day ago: Russell Brand’s Comedy Tour in U.K. Postponed in Wake of Rape and Assault Allegations.  

Shocking that there would be sexual allegations made on a person who once wrote a book claiming to be a sex addict. Too easy mainstream. Look out Robert.

If this goes to court, I expect the judge to throw the book at him; his own book, the one I fed to my worms. He may be completely innocent but when the satanic mainstream media who covers up many sexual deviant’s pounces on you good fucking luck getting out of this. Even if he does expect to lo$e. Expect a rumor out that his name is on the Epstein list, but so is theirs. It’s possible the entire story is a distraction. LOOK, WE CAPTURED A SEXUAL PREDATOR.

How will he worm out of this one?