RUNNING OUT OF TIME

Crows are smart right? How smart? Imagine if your brain remembered every event throughout your lifetime crystal clear. You never utter the words, “I think it happened this way.” Whatever a crow experiences it remembers. It doesn’t forget anything. There’s been a lot of good science proving this. Measure that up to humans. What would it be like to never forget?

I have this very strange thing happening to me right now. I’m trying to contact someone, while another person is trying to contact me. I’m trying to find my English Professor Tina Blue. I want to discuss writing with her again like we did back in 2000. I have some new ideas on writing that I want her opinion on. My search so far is going into the second month. I found people who know her. One is a student of hers in 2003. We entered into a message exchange. He said he doesn’t know if she’s still alive because she was old back in 2003. I told him I have an article dated 2020 that still has her alive. He sent her an email.

No reply from Tina.

I might be running out of time.

While I am searching for a person I learn someone is urgently searching for me. I was contacted by a friend of the person searching for me giving me her contact information.

She’s been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. She can’t remember me. She’s forgetting. Her urgency is she knows this is happening and soon she might have my face in her memory but no name. Or a name, but no face. I might be running out of time.

Back when I was a kid a friend called me and asked me if I wanted to come over and hang out. We hadn’t seen each other in awhile but I was on her mind. I told her I had to work that night and I’d call her sometime and we can set up another time. She said that would be great. A year goes by and I think, I’ve got to call Monica. Five years goes by, I’ve got to call Monica. I promised her. 15, 20—I have to find a way to reach Monica. I told her I’d call. In 2014 or 2015 I finally opened a FB. The first person I search for is Monica. I wanted to eagerly send her this message, “I told you I’d call. Let’s get together and hang out.” The results produce nothing. I message her brother and sister who know me. Neither reply to me even though both are actively posting on FB. I then decided to just Google her name. Her obituary immediately popped up. I ran out of time. It haunts me. Here is my gorgeous friend Monica.

On a layover at the Overtake Transit Station I met a pair of crows. I called them my Saturday crows because I drove the route every Saturday. On my breaks we hung out together. I made several videos of these amazing crows. I wonder if they still think of me.